Written years ago, by MSS Hari Jiwan Singh Khalsa of Espanola, NM, USA
Sat Nam Dear Family,
My kids were here for the holiday. It’s always fun. It’s always illuminating. Time together brings up so much gratitude for having family. It’s always a fun, group therapy time as well. We are all part of a bigger family, our Sadh Sangat (company of the holy). By the way, the word Sadhana comes from this root, Sad (holy) hana (discipline)!
Here’s how I see it, if your kids and your fellow journeyers on this path, your fellow sadhus, still love you, walk with you and cover you after they have become aware of all the mistakes you’ve made and the flaws you have, then you can only thank God and Guru for ultimately protecting and caring for you in this way. You’ve done somethings right. At least that works for me. As a parent, this love is humbling, and deeply experienced. It’s a forever bonding deal. It’s the making of a real family…the kind of family the Siri Singh Sahib Ji, Yogi Bhajan wanted us all to experience, to be a part of.
The Siri Singh Sahib Ji taught that God lives in cozy homes. He set out to create a cozy life-style for us all to live and share. Being a parent means “pay the rent”. Always be there for your child but teach them that their ultimate security lies only with God and Guru and the Sadh Sangat. That’s a very rewarding experience. When we know that we are always a part of a greater family and that this is always there for us , we can relax. The family intent is unified, and verified, and introspection can continue safely. This progression in life is unified in its focus. The experience verifies love; love honed through humility and compassion.
I’ve been blessed to have a family which has loved me beyond. Through all my vacillations they loved me. That’s a really big thing for a father. It puts a lot of pressure to get things right so that their love is made worthy. If they follow my direction I must do better and better and never stop the quest for truth and honesty.
We say daily in our Ardas , our daily prayer before Guru: May we see the faults of others and unsee them. This brings up the concept of forgiveness as it is such a big part of working on relationships. To error is human we know. To keep the love and authenticity real we need to work with forgiveness, for ourselves and others. It is a delicate thing. True forgiveness is only accessed through the subtle body. Vengeance, anger, fear, you name it keep forgiveness at bay. The subtle body/mind accesses the experience of forgiveness through the love of Guru ji. This love is just too addicting to ignore. Forgiveness becomes a small price to pay for the reward it brings. This is why meditation is so helpful.
Yes, many come with various degrees of forgiveness. Some are natural masters of it. But, for the rest of us, forgiveness is an acquired taste. Not only is it unrewarding for a very long time, but, initially, it can be very painful. Forgiveness of oneself and forgiveness of others lies beyond the pain.
When forgiveness becomes real, the awareness of why forgiveness is good becomes manifest. The pain of change changes into love, love for that which greatly helped you change. I hope you understand that. The awareness of the help Guru ji has given is overwhelming.
Why me? Why do I deserve it? Accepting Guru’s Grace is another act of surrender. Good or not I am no longer the judge. ‘I was never good enough in my book’ becomes the mantra. Thank God it’s not in my book that matters. For whatever reason, I’ve been blessed. Serving our teacher and his mission was my gift, my blessing and my redemption. I served the right thing and still do. We, who are students of our beloved teacher, have been specially blessed to follow a true teacher.
The teacher I served was and is so right that he left a teaching so all who come can still serve him. It’s available to all. Study his teachings; practice his way; experience his help. It turns out, he’s the real deal. He can and did deliver what he promised. His way is not only helpful, but beautiful as well. His way is Guru’s way. Stay tuned,